Hmmm this is some crazy stuff!
by The-alice-cullen-freak
Summary: Alice/Edward cheat!Bella/jasper find out and leave!a year later come back HOT!and are together!rating may change!some are OCC! hope you like it!
1. well you got slapped!

So I think I gonna go to the Cullen's house. There hunting but should be home soon.

**At the cullen home**

As I walked in a car pulled up I look over and it was Jasper."Hey Bella what you doing here?"he said to me"well I got really bored at charlies house what you doing here?" I asked "OH I just came to see Alice"awww that's sweet..."WAIT Alice?"

"Yeah why?"he asked questioningly

"Well Edward said that the whole family was going on the trip"i said "come on let go check this out!"so we walked into the house when we heard loud music coming from the top of the stairs. I know even vampires don't listen to music that loud. I jumped on Jasper's back and we ran upstairs to investigate. We walked in and saw something I would NEVER want to see again! Alice and Edward were on top of each other. i herd Jasper growl and we were out in his car. He look at me and said "Bella left a note it said 'Carlisle and Esme I am sorry but I have to

leave I just found out something horrible you two beloved kids (Edward/Alice) have been doing each other. Now I know this may be a surprise I know it was for me to. We as in me and Bella walked in on them and they did not notice so we walked out. i will be back next year. Bella has agreed to go with me. Call me soon as you get this.

Talk to you soon

Jasper Hail/Bella Swan'"

wait leave leave?"okay I'll leave with you when are we coming back?" I asked."when ever you want"

so we drove to Oregon and lived in Salem.

**Alice POV**

it was a good feeling not getting caught cheating!i got a rush and my visions would make it so we didn't get found out Edward told Bella the whole family was going out and I told jasper that I needed some "brother sister bonding time" but he didn't think literal of it. Right then I did not care if someone caught us in the act then I saw a vision of the family coming home early so we had to finish up quick. Once we were done I got dressed and went down stairs to shop on the internet wail Edward played the piano. It was all to easy! Carlisle entered first and him and Esme went strait to there room. I waited for jasper to come but he never came. Then I herd a loud shreak come from Carlisle and Esme's room. There was sobbing and out came a furious Esme "oh crap " was all I herd before I got slapped across the face by my own mother and then she screamed "you and FUCKWARD made me loos my baby girl and my my son!!!how could you?" what is she talking about Emmett and Rose is right there. Then she screamed "you fucked Edward and they left jasper and Bella left they walked in on you and you didn't even notice!"she fell to the floor sobbing then!'OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK' was all I could think. He's gone he left me!so I said "well me and Edward are going out and I am getting a divorce!" by that time Emmett and carlisle were dry sobbing and even Rose look very very sad. Well I do not give a crap about what they think!i will married Edward and we will do IT all the time! When they do come back they will see how happy we are and be super sad!HAHAHAHA I am soooo evil...i guess I am an evil pixie!

**Emmett POV**

wow that was a fun hunting trip!i can't wait to see my FAV human in the whole entire world!she is so nice and Rose said she would try to be nicer to her witch I am happy about!she has always loved Bella as a sister but never showed it because she was scared I guess!well I can't wait!i wonder what Edward and Alice do on a brother sister bonding date I mean I never had one. I think I'll try to get Bella to spend a day with me that would be soooooo fun!gosh will be there any second now! Yeah were home!i can't wait to tell alice of the 4 grizzly's I got!i walked in and I saw alice shopping on the internet and Edward playing the piano. well this is boring!if this is what they do all day that would not be fun AT ALL. Me and Bella will have such a better time!we will go to the amusement park and the water park and the park and I'll push her on the swings and will go for a run and will....did Esme just shreak that weird and now I here sobbing. Esme opened the door maybe I could ask her whats wrong WOW dose she look mad....maybe all ask her later!did she just slap Alice? " YOU AND FUCKWARD MADE ME LOOS MY BABYGIRL AND MY SON !!HOW COULD YOU?!?" Esme screamed at Alice...DID ESME JUST CUSS?!?! wow she must be mad wait loos her baby girl who was she talking about? " you fucked Edward and they left jasper and Bella left they walked in on you and you didn't even notice"she screamed again but then started sobbing. WAIT BELLA LEFT? W-what no she can't she can't!!then the manly Emmett started sobbing yes sobbing!my baby sister is gone!

* * *

ME-yo diggity dog waz upzz

bella-what the hell was that!

ME-idk got bored!soo guess what?!?!?

bella- let me guess you own twilight?

ME-YEP-DIDY

bella-no you don't you own nothing and you suck at spelling and....

ME-OKAY OKAY man i get it i own nothin not even jasper!

bella-well allrighty then

ME-come on jasper lets go get icecream!!

jasper-i don't eat....HUMAN FOOD OKAY?

ME-FINE!!bye and revew LOTS...and i'll give you a day with jasper...coughnotcough


	2. the next year

**Edward POV**

well it's been year and god has it been grate year!the family is still mad at us...but I don't care!me and Alice fuck each other to no end!it has been awesome and every body knows that we (as in me and Alice) are together now. Know one knows what happened to Bella and Jasper. Jasper probably killed Bella. I fell bad for Bella tho she had to die right after she found out her boyfriend cheated on her. but I herd some new kids are coming today. I hope there hot. See I have become kinda a player. I have slept with every girl girl here and Alice does not care!man it will be nice!

**Bella POV**

After we left I asked Jasper to change me into a vampire and he did. His thirst ha gotten much better and we both got a huge makeover. we are dating now and I think it is awsome it too us awhile to get over but we found out that when we were comforting each other we fell in love!so we decided sense we were over it we could move back to forks and finish are last year of high school. my powers are to make the scent of anything go away. to change appearance and to have humanly fetchers like blushing and stuff. So we bought the second biggest house and we moved in now it was time for school .witch means EDWARD and ALICE will be their. GACK!

**Edward POV**

I here a car coming it sounds like a Austin Martin! Damn they must be rich!their care speed ed in and had Parimor blasting loud. A girl got out and was HOTT!damn I can't wait to fuck that!she was wearing a plaid skirt that was red and black and short. a top that showed off her belly button ring and had the words that said I'm HOT you NOT! And some cool shoes. her hair was long and black it had silver strips in it and was up in a long ponytail. looking at her almost made me not see the guy get out of the car..almost. wait she got out of the drivers side and he got out of the drivers side so they were both driving. Weird! He was tall about 6'2 and had a black shirt that was tight ageist his muscles that said

you mess with me and all mess your face! Black pants and his hair was black with silver streaks too but he had a really cool hat on. Wow these are hot people!Alice was staring at the guy we bolth new the plan she will push up on the guy and and get him to do IT with her and I will you my crucked smile on her and she will be putty in my hands!


	3. i come back it gets crazy!

**Bella POV**

Their they were Alice and Edward Cullen. HA! I bet they don't even now who we are yet. This will be funny.

Rose told me what a player he has become so I bet he will just walk over here with his crooked smile and try to take me just like the rest of these girls.

I feel bad for Angela. I hope she will still be my friend.

" Jazz you have to act like were not dating so we can trick Fuckward and pixie-shit" I said in a whisper so only jazz could hear. Then I told him the plan!

He started laughing so hard he had to hold on to the car. After he got over his laughing fit we started the plan. I put on my I-pod and turned it to womanizer And went to sit on the top of the car that's when I took are smell away and turned us back into humans.

Jazz had blue eyes and I had brown. That's when they walked over. Alice went strait towards Jazz and Edward came towards me with that crooked smile of his. " Hello I'm Edward cullen, lets go make out now " he said to me trying to be seductive. " Oh, hello my name is Izzy and hmmm let me think you would not then so I will not now ." I said in a overly happy voice.

He looked dumbfounded. I looked over at Jazz and Alice was up on him trying to do the same thing Edward was doing. That's when I did my human changing thing I turned Jazzy's eyes red Alice jumped about two feet away then I changed him to look like he dose when hes a vampire then I turned my self back into a vampire.

Edward them started screaming like a little girl."No fucking way did fuckward really just scream like a little girl?"by the end of that sentence both of us were holding on to each other laughing are ass's off.

Fuckword and pixy-shit got into a fighting crouch. me s we can go back to being and Jazz just walked away that's when Rose and Em came up to us. "Hey guys sorry I let it get that far but I knew you had something up your sleeves!" Rose said still laughing.

I whisper to Jazz in his ear "its okay I promise in class we can stop acting okay."he look at me then nodded. He knew that I had something planed.(**YOU thought I was going to stop their but no!HAHAHA)**

we walked in to get are schedules ."ha look's like we have all are class's together except one! I wonder how that happened?" I said eying jazz.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(_**In Class)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**_

no fucking way Edward is in the only class I have without Jazz. Fuck fuck fuckedy fuck. Look her he comes now with that cocky grin.

I bet he still dose not know who I am!

**Fuckwards(i mean) Edwards POV**

here igo with the smile damn she is hot man I can't wait to fuck her! she turned on her Ipod to womanizer. I came over to her and said in a seductive voice "Hello I'm Edward cullen, lets go make out now." "Oh, Hello I'm Izzy and hmmm let me think you would not then so I will not now."

WHAT THE FUCK!no girl has EVER and I mean ever talked to me like that!what the hell was she...! that all I got to think before Alice jumped about three feet away. That when I looked when I look at this Izzy girl and her eyes were purple and was a vampire!i screamed and ran to alice. They started laughing. What the hell. Dude! Did I just say dude!ahhh I'm starting to act my age!NOOOO! then they just started to walk away!WITH ROSE AND EM!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(in class)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

no way I have this class with her! man _(day dreams about having sex with Izzy) _oh man I can't wait!so I walked over to her and slapped that nice ass of hers!damn that thang was firm!she turnd to me an punched me in my face and thats when it went black!

* * *

HEYYY sorry it took forever to update!BUT I HAVE EXUSES

comp shut down

2.i was really sick

3.i got grounded

4.i got gounded agian

hahahaha yaim still sick but its been forever!

i would like to thank all the people that revewd and a awesome thanx to Twiligrl and randomlyrandomgirl!

i dont own TWILIGHT WOMANIZER OR IPODS!

You know u love me!

Alice C


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